You really coming over, don't trick.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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