i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
