grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
At least life still wants to fuck me.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize