u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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