The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
where does the pee come out of this thing
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize
