Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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