9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
