maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Couch. On fire.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
