CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
