we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
