How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
You should frame my arrest warrant.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
