What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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