I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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