does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
