this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
