I feel like abortions should bother me more
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize