you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
