That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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