Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
