no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Naked. naked and bneed help.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize