just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
