If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
