went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Is it because I queefed?
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
