I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
just found out that she named her cat after me.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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