Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I DEMAND FORESKIN
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
