He uses pillows to masturbate.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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