So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
