Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
