I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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