I love black thongs
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
where are my eyebrows?
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