he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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