Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
