Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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