i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
