He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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