Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
