We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Randomize
