READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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