Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Blow job season was short but glorious.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
