i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize