OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
