I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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