nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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