The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize