do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
