would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
