why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize