Swine flu is the new snow day.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
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