Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
