I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize