i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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