i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Randomize
